Lest We Forget....

The man on the left is my grandfather…Joseph Thomas Butler. He fathered 11 children, rode a Harley Davidson, served in Gallipolli and sadly died before I was born. My son is named after him, because he was born so close to ANZAC Day.

I know he still watches over me
Lest we forget….

In Flanders Fields

In Flanders fields the poppies blow

Between the crosses, row on row,

That mark our place; and in the sky

The larks, still bravely singing, fly

Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago

We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow

,Loved and were loved, and now we lie

In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:

To you from failing hands we throw

The torch; be yours to hold it high.

If ye break faith with us who die

We shall not sleep,though poppies grow

In Flanders fields.

by Lieutenant Colonel John McCrae, a Canadian artillery officer and military doctor

What happened to our lives?

That was the question my husband asked me this morning....

Last night we had a flashback to our youth at the Tears for Fears and Spandau Ballet concerts. It was an amazing show, but also reminded us that 25 years of our lives had passed.

I was 19 when I first saw them. I was a loyal fan whose wall was covered in their posters. I had all their vinyls, even the limited edition coloured ones. I knew all the words to all their songs. They were my youth.

The once cute band members were now mature aged men. Some had stacked on weight and others had gone bald or grey. Their once young faces showed the wear and tear of 'growing up', getting married, having families - just like their audience!

This was especially highlighed when Spandau Ballet played their old hit Round and Round and included a video of the band when they were younger. It was difficult not to feel your own youth in their video footage and have your own memories flash through your mind - it was a very poignant moment in the concert, where it was difficult to hold back tears.

At the end of the song Spandau Ballet's lead singer, Tony Hadley, finished with the words, "Our lives and your lives"

I think we weren't the only 40 years olds that woke up this mornng and asked the question, "What happened to our lives?"

Nigel seemed a bit sad when he said, "Where did those years go?"

I pondered the question for a while before I answered. I agreed I had felt a knot in my heart and had suddenly realised how 'old' we were now, but my response was a happy one.

"Look at where we are. We have been together for 20 years, surviving marriage together where many haven't.

We have an amazing son. He is healthy, happy, bright and so talented. We couldn't ask for a better gift in our lives. He reflects our love for each other and rocks our world.

We live comfortably and we are about to move in to a home we have spent years designing; a pile of bricks and mutual compromise, patience, trust and the sharing of ideas and opinions.

We have travelled the world together, from the glamour and excitement of New York, London, Berlin, Scandanavia and Alaska to poverty ridden cities in Mexico and Asia.

We either have successful careers, or are working towards them. We have amazing friends and family members, despite losing more and more over the years, like my beautiful mum."

If I had to do it again, I wouldn't change the past 25 years of our lives. What happened to our lives? we 'lived' them!"

Organ Donor Awareness Campaign

Organ donation has become pretty prominent in the media recently with the death of liver transplant recipient, Claire Murray.

Despite the controversial circumstances surrounding Claire, organ donation has once again been brought to our attention.

My ideas/strategies towards the college students would be mostly emotionally triggered. My late mum had a favourite quote, “What the eye doesn’t see, the heart doesn’t grieve”
The need for organ donation is easily ignored when it doesn’t have an impact on our personal lives. We go from day to day hoping it isn’t something we or our close family and friends will ever require.

Here are 5 strategies I would consider using:

1. Getting a group of donor recipients to come to the college to talk about how receiving a transplant has saved and changed their lives. I would use this opportunity to have donor forms given out, with extras for friends and family. Word of mouth is powerful advertising, and if u touch the student you will touch the lives of those important to them.

2. When I was in Berlin I visited the Jewish History Museum. One part of the exhibition that stood out was a collection of small metal coin-like heads. These represented the number of Jews that were killed in the holocaust. It was simple, but had a huge impact. I would use something similar to either represent the number of people in need of a transplant, or those still waiting. I would use something like cardboard or cloth hearts or faces.

3. Utilising the college website banner, reminding students to sign up and link them to somewhere this can be done online. I would consider having a young child or perhaps a parent with children, as the ‘face’ of the campaign and have them on the banner.

4. A display stand with information, brochures and a donation tin. I would sell cloth hearts, similar to those given to my son when his friend Sofia was murdered. We still keep that heart as a reminder of her precious life.

5. A tree set up in the entrance of the college. This would be a ‘tree of life’. When each student shows evidence of being signed up as an organ donor, he/she places a heart on the tree, or something else symbolic.


Even though the campaign is aimed at all organs for transplants, I would use the ‘heart’ as the main symbol to capture the emotional side of the quest, as well as remind people of one of the organs they would be donating.

picture from http://i98.photobucket.com/albums/l244/DDA_04/Berlin/jewish_museum3.jpg

The journey...

In recent years I have lacked motivation. Maybe motherhood has put me in to a comfort zone or given me a new label. Whatever I take on, I take on with passion. When I became a mum, I wanted to become the best mum possible, but I think that came at the expense of my own identity, personal goals and dreams.

I am learning that “being the best mum possible” doesn’t mean I have to completely sacrifice my life. With support, I now have the opportunity to grow and nurture my personal ambitions and dreams. In fact, I am now setting a positive example for my son, and he loves it!

Returning to study, after more than 20 years, has been a struggle. You would have to be pretty egotistical to assume it was going to be easy. The fear of this has held me back, but I feel like I am thriving with the challenge and am embracing it.

I am at a point in my life where money isn’t the driving factor. I am lucky enough to have a very successful career driven husband. I have spent years stepping back to allow him to develop his business, and can’t deny I have benefitted from it materialistically, but it hasn’t allowed me to grow as a person. Helping him out at the office has not been very challenging or rewarding, and was leaving me feeling stifled.

I am able to confidently say these things without offending him, because he has also recognised my frustrations. With his encouragement, and the support of great friends, I have been able to begin my journey.

I love to read and write, and have done so for as long as I can remember. Even as a busy mother I would find time to pen long letters to friends and family. They have been my outlet and audience. They have also been the ones that have encouraged me to do something with these skills.

I find I cope quite well with the writing element of the Cert IV course. When given a blog topic I actually get excited. I love the opportunity to express my ideas.

When it comes to creativity, I admit I stress. I was never very good at art when I was at school, but perhaps that was something I consciously decided and purposely dismissed. What is art anyway? Does it really need to be a perfect image?

I like to think we all have a creative side that can be unlocked. We just need to pull down the walls and try to get back in touch with that side of our minds. I am struggling, but accept this is an area I will see great improvement in, if I keep trying. There are some pretty inspirational artists in our course, so hopefully some of their abilities will rub off on to me.

I have really enjoyed the sharing of skills in our class. I love helping others, and have revelled at the opportunity to do so. I will continue to help other where I can. I also feel confident enough to approach fellow students when I need assistance. The team work has been very rewarding.
My self esteem has been greatly improved. I remember feeling overwhelmed on my first day, being thrown in to a pit of young people, but I have survived and even formed some wonderful friendships.

I already believe in myself more, and others have noticed. I feel like I am part of something important and exciting. I look ahead and ponder about where I may end up, instead of just living aimlessly from day to day.

Keith has been an amazing mentor for me. I feel like he believes in us and his passion is contagious. I know that Keith is what makes me get up in the mornings, especially on Tuesdays! I am a shocking morning person, yet I now willingly bounce out of bed (most days).
I often wonder where I would be now if I had have come across more Keiths in my life, but maybe I wasn’t quite ready before.

I do intend to finish the course. Completing the course will leave me with a feeling of accomplishing something, which is very important to me. I need to ‘own’ this for myself. Any job prospects that come from completing the course will be the icing on the cake!

As with motherhood and other roles in my life, I hope to take this journey on with passion.

picture from http://www.scoop.co.nz/stories/CU0906/S00092.htm